Instagram and How it affects us.


Hello, yes I'm still alive. I just haven't been... writing.

I just felt like sharing my thoughts on this dusty blog and (if there is) anyone who'd like to read it.

Recently I realised that I have an unhealthy obsession over social media (instagram in particular). And honestly, I hate instagram. Sometimes I feel like deleting it. Why, you ask? For youngsters at my age (not sure about those who're older/younger), particularly in their 20's, we like to... compare.

For example, OH MY GOD SHE IS USING A CHANEL BAG THAT COSTS 18K. What am I using? An rm80 handbag that I got on sale. And then I'd go, ohhh I wished I can earn that. And then someone flies to London with a business class plane ticket, and I'd go WOW I'd kill myself to even get an Economy flight ticket! Or, this girl is hanging out here and there, with this person and this person, and what am I doing? Stalking people on Instagram instead of being out there. Oh, how I wished I had her life.

Yes, I must admit, sometimes those thoughts do pop up in my head. And then I'll tell myself to SNAP.OUT.OF.IT.

And then, there is this new phenomenon where people become famous through Instagram. The correct term would be "instafamous", where they have thousands and thousands and thousands of followers. These people, they like to how'd you say, "tayang" themselves and receive compliments from complete strangers. Especially those who are putih, kurus, hidung mancung. Typical cantik.

Now, of course I can't particularly bring myself to become an instafamous person. One thing is because I don't meet the criteria. Haha. But what I don't like is how the society has created this obsession over perfection. And I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. We work our asses off trying to fulfill our lust, our desires. We kill ourselves to get things that we don't need but want.

Let me tell you something, once you start, you can't stop.

And then I start to wonder, where are all the people who matter? Those who work their butts off to save lives. Those who volunteer on weekends at a local shelter home. Those who fight for justice. Those intellectuals who actually leave an impact on the world. People who are too preoccupied trying to make the world a better place rather than putting on make up and taking selfies.

A few weeks ago, I volunteered to help out my campus' debate team for the inter-campus English debate competition. I ended up being part of the team. I mean, coming from someone who only competed once in high school, I gotta admit, I love it. And some people actually think that I have that gift. Not just in debate, but in conversing my thoughts to the public.

When I was younger, I've always wanted to become one of those people who saves lives. Help out those who are in need. But I guess along the way I've slowly forgotten about it, the moment I quit medical school. When I did my diploma in Tapah, we'd go to the local night market on Saturdays and there'll always be some beggars and blind people asking for money. Instead of giving them money, I bought those rm1 packets of nasi lemak and placed it in their baskets. When my friends said, "Hani, baiknya you." I'd just say, "I don't think it's fair that kita makan kenyang-kenyang beli makanan banyak tapi diorang lapar." 

And now, I gotta admit. Instead of worrying about helping others who are needy, I worry about silly things such as "how am I gonna pay for that certain thing that is in my wishlist." So I decided to create more money. If you already didn't know, the term "business" has always been in my blood, starting from my parents. But recently sales for my business wasn't doing very well and I was worried. How am I going to pay back all the debt I incurred? For a whole week I was lost. What am I gonna do?

I almost gave up.

Until I realised, Allah is actually sending me a message. He just took a small fraction of the nikmat that I so beautifully enjoyed without even thinking about the blessings that He has given me all this while. I was greedy. I wanted more.

And then I started to think about the cause of this greediness: Instagram. Why did I let myself to be affected by this situation? Am I not smarter than this? And so, I stopped. I stopped worrying about those silly things. And let me tell you, it wasn't easy. I made doa to Allah SWT to give me inner peace.

I no longer want to live my life based on what I see online, or what people tell me. How I should dress, how I should look, how I should be behaving. I am what I am, I try to be nice to everyone. I am not an extrovert, I tend to be an outcast, a shadow. But when I use my "talent", ie conversing my thoughts in public, I am not someone people can mess around with. I want to do things that matter. Instead of worrying about an 18k bag, or chasing after materialistic things, I truly believe in order to find inner peace you have to do things that matter to you.

Sure, buying a Birkin would make you feel happy. But only for a while. And then you'd want more and more and more. Nothing is ever enough. I'm not saying that chasing after worldly goods is wrong, I'm simply implying that we shouldn't be too obsessed over it that we get stressed over it to the extent that inter-human relationships become affected.

So HOW can you relate Instagram with your life? Like I mentioned before, we unknowingly create this obsession over unlimited worldly desires - beauty, clothing, automobiles, etc. What we should be focusing on is how many deeds have we done in a day. And my plan? To use my "talent" for the better. To speak up more on important issues and raise awareness.

This is a reminder, to you, and to me. InsyaAllah.

p/s: And guess what? As I am writing this I managed to get a new business contract. See? God's miracles!


A lovely weekend

The past weekend was a lovely busy weekend I must say. On Saturday it was Ayah's birthday and a few days earlier prior to the birthday I wanted to plan a surprise with kakak. I had it all in my head... Balloons, cake, confetti. Check.

But thanks to Mama the party pooper she mentioned the word "surprise" to Ayah many times so tak menjadi. Haha. So we resorted to having a family bbq dinner at home and baked a cheesecake. On Saturday, we were busy prepping for the bbq, ie marinating, baking, and buying more groceries.

And then after Maghrib prayers we started bbq-ing! 

Our backyard bbq pit. It was initially smaller but ayah renovated it and now it is bigger. We even have an unused outdoor toilet (cos everyone's afraid to use it, haha). 

First thing that we bbq-ed was the kebabs!

Pasang panjut at the bbq area.

The cheesecake!

Happy 55th Birthday to my beloved Ayah!

We had Australian beef steak, a bit of lamb, chicken wings, sausages and other side dishes. Yum!

Only photo of the ladies. The boys were all looking selebet and selekeh. What do you expect... We were all bbq-ing and sweaty and undressed. Hehe

The next day, we attended the wedding of Fazrena and Bakri. If you don't already know, Faz is the owner of the famous hijab line TudungPeople and her husband is the famous photographer Bakri Hafiz of wsvs.co. I guess you can call them the famous artistic couple? 

Beautiful decor I must say. We were all like, wow. 

You can view more photos of the wedding on Instagram with the hashtag #bakfazjournal.

After the wedding, we headed back home as I was planning a small Raya makan-makan with some of my girlfriends. The first reaction I get from most of them who came over for the first time was "Haniii cantiknya rumah you!" Credits to my parents for designing such a beautiful home. Hehe

Some of my girlfriends from Egypt back in medical school years. They're already in their 5th year and will graduate, insyaAllah by December 2016. How fast time flies. If I still continued my journey I would be Dr Hani by now. But I guess Allah had different plans for me, and although I didn't crack my brain cells for medicine, I cracked it off for Actuarial Science and now, ICSA which consists of 90% law. I never became a doctor but I have hundreds of doctor friends so I guess that would be of convenience in the future, right? 

One of my bestfriends/partner in crime Aida. Aida is doing ACCA so she understands what I'm going through when it comes to study-wise. Hehe

My close friends Shaza and Azryn, and Mimi whom I just met and befriended yesterday. 

It was a great weekend Alhamdulillah. Busy upcoming week as I have weekly targets for my studies and also other extra-curricular activities!

Till then, wassalam. :)


Paris : Part 3

The day after Disneyland, I initially planned to visit Chateau Versailles. I really wanted to go there but because we got back home really late the night before I just told everyone that we'll go around Paris instead. (More reasons for me to visit Paris again, hehe). So we left home a little late to the afternoon as everyone was too tired to get up early.

First stop was Sacre Couer. Because the temperature was spiking hot on that day and being typical Asians that didn't want to sweat, we took the tram to go up the hill. Haha

The price to take the tram is just the same like taking a one way ticket for the metro in Paris, which is 1.70 Euros for one way. So that's 3.40 Euros back and forth, if you get yourself a carnet (a pack of 10 tickets).

Up there, is the view of Paris.

Do I love this view? Yes I do. But I would love to see it at night or during the winter, autumn and spring. Because it was Summer the weather was just too hot so the sunlight was too glaring and you can't really appreciate the beautiful view. But nonetheless Paris is just beautiful. We also entered the church since it was free but no photos were allowed inside.

Next, we headed to Palais Garnier.

 We didn't enter the Palais but it must be beautiful inside. If I'm not mistaken this was the setting for the Phantom of the Opera. Next, we walked to Palais Royal and on the way we stumbled upon a small flea market.

Got that stack of raspberries for 6 Euros. Yum.

 All that time when I was at the flea market was, "MUST SNAP PHOTOS FOR MAMA". Lol

Palais Royal is surrounded by this beautiful lush garden. At the garden, there were people just playing games and chilling and reading. Such a cool way to live a life in a hectic city.

We just passed by Palais Royal as it was just beside the Louvre. From the Louvre, we took a metro to Trocadero. Spent the remaining evening waiting for the sunset as we wanted to go on the night cruise. And waiting for sunset means waiting forever (more reasons to hate Summer, haha).

We just chilled at a cafe riiight below the Eiffel Tower. Don't ask the price as it is, of course pricey just to get some light food. But what can we do, we were all tired from waiting. Decided to try the famous Nutella crepe. Not bad, not bad at all. But I preferred the crepe that I had in London.

And then we finally got on the cruise!

Paris is such a beautiful city that photos do no justice to how romantic and stunning it really is. You really have to come to Paris once in your life (in my case, third time) and see it for yourself. That was the last day that we were in Paris before we headed to our next destination. That was my second time on the cruise and I can really go a hundred times on it and still be in awe of how beautiful it is.

I actually wished I could spend more time in Paris, but maybe insyaAllah if I have more rezeki would like to come again and spend more time in the city just exploring every nook and cranny.

Je t'aime, Paris!


Raya 2014

2 blog posts in a day?! Well I'm surprised too hahah. But thanks to my iphone now I don't have to transfer pictures to my laptop and then write a post (which I'm very much lazy to do). Now I can just write whenever I feel like it!

Anyway, this year my opah decided to spend her first half of Ramadhan in Kuantan and the remaining half at our house. Which means that Eid will be in KL. Opah is my mother's mother and my mother has 6 siblings altogether. So we're quite a big family I guess.

On the first day of Eid all my relatives came over to our house and spent the day here taking pictures and eating and talking. Nothing new there. As for my father's side, well my grandmother Tok is no longer fit to celebrate Eid and is bedridden at my aunt's house in Puncak Alam. So we visit them instead.

With my pregnant cousin. Opah will have a cicit very soon!

The rest of the days were just us shifting from one place to another. Same people, different homes. As for our baju Raya, no new purchases were made. We just recycled the ones that we made from kakak's wedding in December and wore those instead.

Suffice to say that it was a fulfilling Aidilfitri, Alhamdulillah. ;)